Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Last week, my oldest two girls went to music camp. They, along with about 50 other children, put together a fabulous production called, "Go, Go, Jonah!" The music was really great...nothing more beautiful than the sound of sweet, cherubic voices singing Bible songs.
One day, part of their "homework" was to talk with their parents about the parents' favorite Bible verses.
One of my favorite verses that I shared is, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." It came easily to my mind, especially since I had been using this verse to remind one child in particular that she can do even the hard stuff that comes her way.
What I've discovered about myself since I so quickly offered this verse, however, is that I don't really want to do all things. I know that Christ will give me the strength to bear all...even things that seem impossible to bear. But I really don't want to bear all things.
In reality, I just want to avoid most of the painful stuff. In reality, I just want to find another verse and claim it as my own. You know the one. It says that Christ will take away all the pain that would come my way if I didn't know Him. Except, as far as I can tell, that verse is nowhere to be found in my Bible.
Now that is a real downer. Because as the clock ticks down to the birth of our fourth child, I am extremely uncomfortable and unmotivated. And for the past few weeks, I've been thinking that this was enough pain already. I mean, really.
And then...whammy. I won't go into specifics, but let me just tell you that the pain that I've been experiencing multiplied within the course of a day. And nothing that I've done has reduced the pain. I've been trying desperately to stay off of my feet to avoid putting any more pressure on this part of my body. But in the end, nada.
And I have to tell you, I don't really want to bear this pain. I haven't been thinking about how I can get through this with Christ's strength. I've been trying to get around it with His strength. And when I think about how the birth of this sweet baby girl is very probably going to complicate the pain that I'm already having....ugh!!!!
Now I'm not saying that I should be out looking for pain. But, it's here, and now is my chance to be a life lesson, right?
Am I going to try to teach my child that she can do all things through Christ and remind her when she complains, "But, Mom, I don't waaaaant to do that........" that she can get through even the most difficult of circumstances...yet act in the same childish way when my turn comes?
What a blunder that would be. A missed opportunity. Something that I am sure I would look back on later with serious regret.
So my resolution for tomorrow: I will re-adopt an attitude of servanthood. I will respond patiently to my children even when correcting them. I will do at least one thing for each of them that will serve them...even if I don't want to do it (like maybe play Noah's ark on the floor...have you seen my belly recently?). I will find at least two or three ways to build my husband up and encourage him. In short, I will actively and purposefully love them. In the end, that's what I want us all to look back on and remember. That we truly loved each other. No matter what.