thoughts on daily life within our family of SIX....each child in her own phase of childhood....

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Excuse Me, Ma'am

I will try to be as delicate as possible when I ask you this question. But, ahem, have you ever been...you know, interrupted? Now, I don't mean in the bathroom (who hasn't been interrupted during showers, baths, and other bathroom-type business?). I don't mean while on the phone with a friend or while writing your latest post to your blog. I mean, you know, during a moment with your husband? A very private sort of moment?

I ask you this today because I am precisely the kind of wife/mom who worries about what the children are doing and where they are doing it during intimate moments. I would be in utter shock, and I'd just absolutely just want to sink through the floor if we were ever "discovered".

Today, in preparation for my daughter's birthday, and to celebrate the fact that it was Saturday and my husband and I didn't actually have to be installing floors or painting walls (that's a story for another day, my friend), our sweet children were downstairs making birthday hats, signs and, no doubt, scarfing down a little pre-breakfast sugar. My husband and I were rubbing the sleep from our eyes and chatting sleepily about what we were going to do for the birthday.

The kiddos came up to visit and then trotted back downstairs to finish their preparations. Klop, klop, klop. Pad, pad, pad. Plop, plop, plop. Boy, our stairs are loud.

Around then, my husband, famous for the line, "Got a minute?" snuggled a little closer and tried to start a little something. We shut the door, but alas, no lock on this particular door. Shhhhhh. Listen....The monitor's on, right? Check. A couple of minutes later....shhhhhhh, wait....they could come in...

"We'd hear 'em," he said, reminding me of how loud our stairs are and how easily we heard them as they came up the first time. Okay, he's right. But, shhhhh. We've gotta' listen. I need more blanket.....shhhhh

Three or four minutes later, I heard, "You want a cookie?!!!" And this is what I saw....

TWO FEET FROM MY FACE!

No plop, plop, plop. No pad, pad, pad. No klop, klop, klop. No door opening noisily, no, "Hey, Mom..." Just silence until she was right there. Two feet from my face. Offering us our share of her pink, frosted cookie. Darling girl. My face literally burned, and I was suddenly spinning in an ocean of, "OH MY GOSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!"

However, the sweet girl didn't seem to notice my blushing face or the fact that nothing that I said was making sense. She continued to show us how lovely the cookie was and to tell the story of how she got it. Then she proceeded to show us the red, shiny, plastic ring that came off of one of her Valentines. It was, indeed, lovely. A truly magnificent piece of jewelry that I studied fastidiously as I secretly tried to figure out what I could say to make her LEAVE THE ROOM!

Now, I think that she thought that we were playing. Or snuggling. I mean, lots of covers were involved. And, thank goodness, after about five minutes of brilliant conversation, she did think of something else that she needed to do to prepare for the big day. And as the blood drained from my face, I had to thank God for sheets and blankets and pillows....and unsuspecting little girls.

Okay, now let me know your story (please tell me that you have one, too!).

12 comments:

Missy @ It's Almost Naptime said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA

Ok. I do not have a story (yet) but this did happen to my friend. The worst part was that she was on top. Fortunately she had her nighty on, but still. Her 7 year old walked in, gasped, and ran out of the room. Friend freaked out while also getting really angry at laughing not taking it seriously husband.

She went upstairs and found her daughter crying. Awful, right? But mommy brain kicked in fast and she told her that Daddy wouldn't wake up, and she was tickling him to get him to wake up.

Daughter bought it.
WHEW.

Megan@SortaCrunchy said...

Oh my GOSH! Well, our oldest is still a crib dweller so this has not happened (like Missy said - YET) but oh my GOSH!!!!!!!!! I would just die. Good thing covers were involved. Or it could have turned into an unplanned but very authentic "teaching moment."

hee hee hee!

Jennifer said...

Ok - I HAVE A STORY - our 8 year old was around 3 or 4 years old and were living in a rental house where the master bedroom was in the front of the house, separated from the living areas and other bedrooms. We did have a lock, but didn't ever use it because the door didn't close properly and would get seriously stuck. So, if Alex wanted to come in, it was painfully obvious and we would have time 'cover up'. Apparently the door decided to not stick this one time because in the middle of it all, we hear this little voice asking "What you doin to my mommy?" Michael turns around and sees Alex standing there, scowling. I couldn't help by laugh hysterically at this point because there were no covers involved, and I couldn't get to them fast enough. Michael stammered for a few seconds then replied "I'm giving your mommy a backrub, now go play." And it apparently worked because Alex smiled, leaned in for a quick kiss from daddy, then ran off.

It's bound to happen at some point, so maybe this will be it for you guys and she won't remember it :)

Anonymous said...

I have a friend who had her house on the market....came home from church on a Sunday afternoon, put the baby down for a nap....then snuggled in with hubby for a little well, you know....and suddenly heard a realtor in the house, showing it to prospective buyers...there is a reason they are supposed to CALL FIRST!

Anonymous said...

oh yes, it does happen.... Not nearly as comical as your's.

Katrina said...

We haven't had kids walk in on us yet, but I did walk in on my parents...as an ADULT! My husband and I were visiting them, and my sister called late at night. I didn't see a light on under the door (thick carpet), so I walked right in. OOPS! There was plenty of embarrassment on my part and hilarity on theirs. Yikes. I think I need to go wash my eyeballs again.

Our bedroom door latch is broken, so we can't lock it, but we make good use of our old baby gate as "back up" protection...lol!

Life In Progress said...

Oh my goodness....that realtor story is crazy! I would have died.

This hasn't happened to us yet, but it will. Our three-year-old is very quiet when she comes down the stairs from her room (our room is on the main floor). Just a few days ago my husband mentioned that we need to start locking our door.

Dimple Queen said...

OH MY GOSH!!!! TOO FUNNY!!!! Actually this has happened to us once....We moved into our house a little over a year ago. The kids had been a sleep for a while and the hubby gave me "THE LOOK" from across the living room. I told him the kids were probably about to wake up, and he said "SO...we can lock the door!" SO off we went. He shut the door, locked it, and started getting busy. I was sitting on the edge of the bed completely naked with him standing in front of me, not naked yet, when all of a sudden the door come flying open. He turned around to shield me while I got under the covers of the bed that had not been made yet, to see our 5 year old standing there. He told him, "I need to talk to Momma. Can you go watch some cartoons? We'll be in there in a minute." After T left the room, he checked the door. The knob was locked, but we didn't realize that you had to push hard on the door to get the thing to catch!!! LOLOL We both sat there and laughed for a while before we could "carry on with business"

About the realtor story....I would have had to have a chat with her after that one!!!

Thanks for stopping by my "place" this weekend. You ought to go buy What About Bob....you would save yourself some money in the long run!! :)

Angela

Martha said...

I don't have any of "those" stories yet, but my daughter's not even three yet, so there's plenty of time for embarrassment.

4 Little Men said...

Oh never.... yeah right! We've had a few close calls and a few holy cows. We have loud stairs too and it's still hard to hear them sometimes. Yes... thank goodness for covers. Our door doesn't lock either... we actually bought a hook for the top... just haven't put it up yet.

Brittany

Kelly @ Love Well said...

Oh we've SO had this happen. Luckily, our kids are pretty innocent and clueless. If we're under the covers, they just go about their business (exactly like your daughter), ask their question and then leave. (Although a few times we've had to come up with something for them to go do. "Ummm, honey, can you go see what time it is on the kitchen microwave?) That way, we can come out from under the covers without giving anything away.)

We are pretty faithful with using our lock these days. It's just too hard to relax when you're listening for the kids all the time.

screamofcontinuousness said...

something to look forward to I guess.

I HAVE had an (adult) family friend walk into my house unannounced once. She was used to just knocking and coming right in. Normally we would be hanging around the house doing normal publicly view-able stuff. But this once......

My hubby and I both yelled out for her to please just stay in the living room and we'd be there in a minute.

talk about an awkward conversation....

I found your blog through Missy, btw. funny stories.